Today’s ramblings: Stalker boyfriends

I am such a romantic at heart. I love stories with kissing in the rain, stolen kisses, subtle brushes of the skin, quick embarrassed glances and smoulder. I love YA because romance is more often than not, one of the big focuses.

YA is obviously for young adults i.e. teenagers. So why, why, why do some authors insist on using the whole stalker boyfriend trope? I don’t get it! I therefore have a list for you, on why I don’t like stalker boyfriends.

1. I love watching you sleep

Image result for watching you sleep gif

Ok, I drool and talk in my sleep, I don’t want ANYONE watching me. I’m not in some deep beautiful slumber like sleeping beauty. If I wake up and see you staring me, I will scream and maybe even punch you. You sneaking into my room at night is weird and downright creepy.

2. I bought you a car, even though you specifically said you didn’t want one

Image result for i don't need your money honey gif

If I love my crappy little car but you don’t, deal with it. I may reconsider if we sit down and have a discussion about it, and talk about options. If you replace my car with a new one, with no discussion whatsoever, don’t expect me to be appreciative. I will most likely be spiteful and see the car, retrieve my old one, then use the remainder of the money to buy a library.

3. Don’t leave my sight, don’t leave town without telling me

Image result for don't leave me gif

Umm hold the hell up buddy! I don’t need your permission to go anywhere, and I don’t need a babysitter. If we have been together for a while, I will let you know what I am doing, I may even ask you to come along if you’re nice. Being controlling is NOT hot and it’s NOT sexy….period.

4. I’ve put a tracking device in your jacket/phone etc….to keep you safe

Image result for caught out gif

If it’s something you are doing for my safety, discuss it with me first. Attaching it without letting me know makes me think you have ulterior motives, and I would rather not have to worry about that if I already have killer angels or vamps coming after me. I also don’t really want you knowing that I am pigging out at Ben & Jerry’s at midnight…unless you really need to know.

5. I’ve been watching you from a distance…to keep you safe

Image result for stalker gif

No, no, no! Creepy!!! Seriously, get the f%@! away! If there is anyone I need to be kept safe from, it’s you!!!

~~~~~

I think one of my other issues with this kind of trope, is that in the books, the person who is the victim of the stalking always seems to love it and find it romantic. It is not romantic, and I think the more this behaviour is condemned in books, the better it will be for the younger generations who read these books.

The only character I can kind of excuse for their stalkerish behaviour is Mr Darcy. His wasn’t an intentional kind of stalking, he was in love and really didn’t know what the hell he was supposed to do. I’m sure there are other ones out there that can be excused also, I just can’t think of them right about now.

~~~~~

Well that’s all from me today! What are your thoughts on stalker tropes – hot or not?

Steff xx

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20 comments

  1. Tiana · February 22

    This post is so relatable, none of these things are ok. I had a friend that acted like this to her boyfriend and it was actually kinda scary to watch. All these things are really unhealthy for relationships and it’s sad and scary to think that relationships like that actually happen.

    Liked by 1 person

    • littlebookynook · February 22

      They’re terrible aren’t they! And the fact that so many books promote this kind of behaviour and that it’s acceptable!

      Liked by 1 person

      • Tiana · February 22

        I completely agree! Mistreatment in a relationship for any reason is not ok and it shouldn’t be promoted. It’s heartbreaking that so many people are in relationships like that. If you love someone and are with them you should be able to trust them.

        Liked by 1 person

      • littlebookynook · February 22

        Exactly, relationships should be built on trust. None of this stalker stuff, I find it soooooo unappealing! I definitely think it is something that needs to be talked about more often.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. JJAzar · February 22

    Hahaha! Yeah, these are pretty outrageous. Creepy indeed. I enjoyed your funny commentary 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    • littlebookynook · February 22

      Thanks! I hate to think there are people out there who think this behaviour is attractive…no, no and no! Thanks for reading 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. avathenerd · February 22

    This was a great post! Stalker boyfriends are creepy as hell, it baffles me how some people find it romantic.
    On another note really liked all the gifs you put.
    Thanks for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Elou Carroll · February 22

    This is definitely a trope that needs to take a short walk off a tall cliff. There’s no need for it unless you’re actually appropriately exploring the dark side of a relationship like that, with your protagonist running for the hills. I would love to see THAT in a book aimed at young adults. Romanticising it, not cool.

    Liked by 1 person

    • littlebookynook · February 23

      I would love to see that in a book lol. Yeah I am really not a fan, people learn from the books they read and then think this sort of stuff is romantic. Thanks for reading!

      Liked by 1 person

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  6. K. A. Botello · February 23

    I hate it when girls in books act like they love being treated like objects. All of these behaviors are unacceptable, I agree completely!

    Liked by 1 person

    • littlebookynook · February 23

      I get so annoyed when all these women seem to adore 50 Shades of Grey. Both characters are just the worst role models…ever! Thanks for reading 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • K. A. Botello · February 23

        Yes, exactly! It is definitely challenging to get the balance just right, but those are obvious things to avoid.

        Liked by 1 person

  7. theorangutanlibrarian · February 23

    Oh gosh this is such an awesome post!! I hate this trope as well- why do authors think it’s a good idea?? hahaha yes- agree with you about watching someone sleep- it’s not romantic, it’s CREEPY!!! And yes to the buying a car thing! And agree about the “I’m keeping you safe” thing!!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Marie · February 23

    Haha I love this. I don’t know how it can be seen as romantic when it’s just crazy and kind of creepy to be honest – I hate this kind of trope just as well!

    Liked by 1 person

    • littlebookynook · February 24

      It’s terrible isn’t it!! If someone who said they were interested in me did all those things, I would run!!!! Thanks for reading 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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